Example Case #2: "Peter"
(The following is not based on any of my real cases. It is an example of how I use my skills.)
Drug and alcohol evaluation
Peter asked for a drug and alcohol evaluation. I used a standardized evaluation and a TA evaluation in order to get deeper insights into the pattern.
He was at a tipping point. If he continued to drink at his current level, it would soon be difficult to stop. He tried to reduce his intake, but found he could not control it. He began attending AA. He progressed through the steps and attained his sobriety, but ran up against his intimacy issues. I suggested he attend Adult Children of Alcoholics for difficult childhoods. He confronted his neglected childhood. Both of his parents were adult children of alcoholics. They were distant, cool and left him on his own. When he found a romantic relationship, it tended to be with someone who was clingy, which promptly pushed him into revulsion or with a woman who was distant.
We began inner child work and found his younger self playing alone in his bedroom. Upon talking to this child, he discovered a lack of information about love, closeness, boundaries, resolving conflict and processing emotions. He began learning emotional skills and Marshall Rosenberg’s Nonviolent Communication. He found his daily relationships at work improving. (NonViolent Communication is not about violence. It helps establish the needs of each person in a relationship).
He started dating and discovered that he would either be needy, clingy or distant. We used Alchemical Hypnotherapy to give his Inner Child the experiences of stable affection that allows independence. As we worked, he became more selective about who he dated. Eventually, he found a woman who could be affectionate AND independent. She challenged him to change the areas of intimacy that sabotaged their relationship. He married her and has a satisfying marriage. They are able to be close, independent and resolve conflicts. They are planning for their first child.